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The Quest is on for the Perfect Tea Biscuit

I've got a tea addiction. I only drink it once a day, but if I don't have this elixer of life as soon as I wake up, I gradually turn into the force—only, it won't be with you. I prefer masala chai—I'm not talking about the weird shit posing as chai that you get from the two-tailed mermaid down the street. I'm talking about authentic, straight-up Indian style, classic, you could die this is so good, masala CHAI!

The ingredients of this easy-to-make, aromatic, heavenly brew involves black tea, an assortment of spices, sugar, and a splash of half and half (if you want details, hit me up and I'll hook you up). Actually, fuck it. Here it is:


  • Boiling water (duh)
  • Brook Bond Taj Mahal Orange Pekoe Black Tea*
  • Sugar
  • Half and Half and 1/4 tsp of this*:
Illustration for article titled The Quest is on for the Perfect Tea Biscuit


  • Add sugar, spice mix, and tea bag to a cup.
  • Pour in the boiling water and let it steep for 3-4 minutes.
  • Add a splash of half and half until it looks caramel brown colored.
  • Stir and effing enjoy the wonder that is masala chai. #mystery_solved.

Usually, I just have my tea with a slice of plain old toast with butter, but I'm sick of it and so now I'm on the prowl for a good biscuit that will accompany my tea.


Let's start with Le Dolce Vita (yes those are Planters honey-roasted peanuts making a cameo in the background). This stuff is addictive. I don't even have the patience to wait for my tea to brew to dig my hand into this plastic tub to pull out those succulent morsels of almond, anise cookies. My mom and I are currently in a race to the finish and I growl whenever I see her hover around them.

Illustration for article titled The Quest is on for the Perfect Tea Biscuit

That being said, it's not the best tea cookie out there. It kinda has a weird stale texture to it once you dunk it into the tea—not sure why that is. I need something that, once combined with tea, will turn into sheer bliss and thus enhances the flavors of both biscuit and tea at the same time.

You can find cheese for wine, and cake for coffee, but where the hell is my damn biscuit for tea!? I know you're out there biscuit—I won't stop looking for you. I won't give up. You complete. my tea.


*you can find this at most Indian stores.

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